I’ve had reason to think about integrity and authenticity and how we convey our true selves in any moment. Who do you want to appear to be versus who do you want to be, especially when making decisions?
I’ve had this advice taped to my wall for three years and it’s still timely.
‘Highly credible people make decisions to “suspend judgements” when considering another person’s perspective. They do this because they are okay with being wrong – or, at bare minimum, okay with having their opinions challenged. This doesn’t mean they don’t have passion and strong beliefs. It simply means that their minds are open to other opinions, even if those are quite different from their own.’ – Sandy Allgeier, The Personal Credibility Factor.
When I don’t know what I really think and someone else seems either sensible or convincing, it’s better to park it. I give it a deadline, put it aside and wait until I am sure I’m sane, focused and neutral. Parking it buys you time within the decision deadline and enables your reptilian brain to calm down. I also find I can reread someone’s email differently, hear them, or at last entertain their viewpoint better after a little time. You can take a moment to check your gauging of others or just for yourself, it works equally well. What’s a moment, in a lifetime of judgement calls, after all?
Please feel welcome to reply to me in the comments, I love your feedback.